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Are mothers more stressed than fathers when it comes to caring for the baby?
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May 25, 2020Are mothers more stressed than fathers when it comes to caring for the baby?
If we must admire one quality of our peers, they certainly stress less than we do. And yes, mothers are much more stressed than fathers when it comes to caring for a baby.
The truth is that we worry too much, we want to take care of everything more than we should and protect our kids even from the smallest mosquito. Fathers, on the other hand, are calmer and allow for a little more freedom, which for us is just too immature! And again, we get stressed.
What does the research indicate?
A recent study indicated that mothers are less happy than fathers on parenting tasks. It does not mean that we are not happy being mothers, but it simply meant we assume far more responsibilities and dedication to our kids.
Another research was conducted by scientists at Cornell University, the University of Minnesota, and the Minnesota Population Center, which focused on the time mothers and fathers spend with their children. This study concluded that women do feel more tired, stressed, and less happy than men when it comes to parental responsilities.
Some studies carried out in the American Survey of Time in the years 2010, 2012, and 2013, with 12,000 parents in the United States (fathers and mothers) engaging in different activities with their children, in hugely different environments, had the same conclusion; fathers are less stressed than mothers when it comes to taking care of the baby.
The mothers, for their part, are attentive to the home, school, doctors, birthdays, which prevents them, in many cases, from enjoying with their children. Even problems can arise in the couple because of this.
The bond that unites an authentic family is not of blood, but mutual respect and joy
-Richard Bach-
Do dads enjoy their babies more?
Another study also found that fathers enjoy more time with their children. Adding that it is good for fathers to spend more time with their children because the treatment is different from that offered by the mother.
Read also: 6 tips to a happy motherhood
Mothers become more stressed due to the number of baby care and other family activities they ought to do. This predisposes mothers to be more stressed than fathers when it comes to caring for the baby as well.
Maternal activities tire much more.
Lack of sleep is another consequence of the accumulation of fatigue in mothers. We are always the first to wake up the moment the baby cries, increasing stress. After the collection of this information from thousands of parents, it was concluded that parenting does generate stress.
A little help does not hurt, to make mothers less stressed
Although it cannot be generalised, it will be positive to give a little more support to all mums.
More men are indeed beginning to contribute enormously to raising their babies and it will be amazing for all cultures to adopt this way of life.
If a balance is achieved in all the responsibilities of having a baby, mothers will surely have much more leisure time with their children and thus be able to enjoy them much more.
A day when the father gets up at night to feed the baby, takes the baby to the doctor when he/she is unwell, and spends some maternal tasks….this will allow the mother to rest which in turn will make her happy and she will feel well in herself to be able to take care of her entire household with no issues.
Do you agree with this trend of thoughts?
Yvette Mayemelle Kaba
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25 Comments
In my household, I am more stressed by the children while my husband is more stressed by work. Then again, the children are my “work” so….
Asking ourselves why we’re stressed is so important because most of the time we are either fast forwarding into the future or reverting backwards to the past. Living in this moment and accepting what it is the key to our happiness.
It definitely makes sense why moms are more stressed than dads. Thanks for brining attention to the issue. Hopefully it’ll help get some moms some relief.
Indeed Brenda and that was the main purpose for writing this article.
This is fascinating! I have definitely noticed many of these trends in our house, so interesting that there is research to back it up!
Awww thanks Sarah for reading x
I totally agree with this. I actually wrote a post on something similar. But more importantly, my fiance and I had a hard conversation about this same topic. Because I had to realize how much stress I was putting on myself by not allowing him to help as much as he actually wanted to.
It is so easy for things like this to be overlooked and ignored. Glad you’re having those conversations already x
I’m half and half on this one. I do agree that us mothers are more stressed because we are the ones in the weeds of it all the time. However, I also think we like it. If our husband’s took them for the day for us to rest we would probably stress worrying that they were doing everything all wrong. I think we are just more innately controlling of the child reering.
Thanks Bri for your input
As a mom of two I am definitely more stressed than my husband. I think it comes with the territory. My husband LOVES our babies and works hard for his family and when he is home he smothers them with love and attention, but me being the primary caregiver and home with them all day I am definitely more stressed.
It is not easy to be a stay at home home. Well done to you and do remember to take care of yourself too
I think a lot of families are becoming more aware of this concept, that mothers do more and are more stressed in the parenting department. Communication is major key. One of the reasons women do more is because of how their brains are wired; as in they can have a continuous rotation of to do lists going through their brain in a short time frame whereas men are more compartmentalizing. I’ve found that in our family if I tell my husband the things that need to be done he’s really good about doing what he can. I think men like him are becoming more common than in previous generations.
Thanks Shayla for your input and I totally agree communication is the key to help us mothers to feel less stressed.
i think a mother’s stress is just different than a father’s, not quite more or less. just different
Helping one another is important when you’re raising kids. Hubby and I tag-team through it daily.
Indeed Fatima and loving your idea to tag-team each other.
I truly believe it depends on the kind of parent you are. My husband and I are so different and i am definitely more relaxed and calm. HE is more stress because he just likes it the way he does. But love your article!
Thanks for reading and interesting to see the reverse in your situation. Would you say it all boils down to our unique parenting style?
One thing a friend told me was: “I will be that friend coming over 6 months after the baby is born, to hold and play with the baby while you do something for yourself, that long after the baby is born and everyone else thinks all is good”. I agree that we do stress more as mothers.. we also want to be perfect and frequently compare ourselves, which I don’t think fathers do. Fathers probably stress more about the financial part of having kids :p
I loving the idea of how fathers do stress too but on the financial front. Good thinking and thanks Taila for reading.
Great read. I agree! Not to say dads don’t stress but speaking from a mother’s perspective we tend to be more hands on when it comes to the children.
Thanks Shinelle for reading and for your input too x
I think dads experience stress in a different way. They tend to experience stress in a sense of not knowing what to do or how to help. That’s where communication really comes in.
Totally agree that communication is a key to help reduce the stress and strain in any relationship. Thanks Cyndi for your contribution x